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- Were kisses all the joys in bed, one woman would another wed.
- William Shakespeare, "Sonnets to Sundry Notes of Music IV"
- Simple: If a woman would not have sex in bed (just kisses) she would marry another man.
- The problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time
- Simple: When men have sex they can only think of sex, and can not think logically (avoiding unwanted risk etc.).
- When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities.
- Matt Groening, From "Basic Sex Facts For Today's Youngfolk" In Life In Hell
- Simple: When some people tell you how bad sex is you need to learn that you can't have sex with them (a euphemism for "messing with someone".)